Thursday, March 26, 2009

Just a Little Bumpy

I feel grumpy - or "Bumpy" which is what Delaney called it when she 2 or 3 and it has just sort of stuck. Bumpy really sort of captures the mood don't you think? I feel like I'm in a constant state of PMS right now - everything and everyone is bugging me.

Sometimes it is all just a little too much - the kids whining or being mouthy, dogs barking, bird screeching, unlimited work commitments, economic distress (things are pretty tight right now for us, as with so many other people out there - not as bad as some, but definately tight). And why oh why do I volunteer to take on a new project every time something comes up? I just can't seem to say no - but I really piss myself off when all I have to do is keep my mouth shut but I pipe up and say "I can do that!" This time of year too, I should really know better - especially for things that really have no benefit to my family right now in these tough times.

You would think all the exercising and running I've been doing would relieve the stress, but honestly I kind of feel guilty and selfish by taking that time for myself, asking my husband or older daughter to watch the little girls, and just not spending that time with my family. I know, I know...taking time for yourself is suppose to make you a better mother...but I don't really know if that crap is holding true for me. Do I feel healthier? Yes, but I also feel a bit absent and I definitely still get grumpy and short tempered with my kids. Not quite a ZenMom yet, more like a ZinMom - as in I think I need a little wine tonight dear, the girls are driving me crazy! Which probably is not a good choice for me or the kids. (Mom if you are reading this, I am not doing this very often - I'm not an alcoholic). Really, I just feel like I'm always falling a little short of what I should be doing - not so perfect am I (this is just annoying in and of itself).

Okay, sorry for the bitchfest. I'm done.

7 Talk to me people!:

Non-Runner Nancy said...

I seem to remember a similar post where you weeded out unnecessary tasks and reprioritized because you had overcommitted. Maybe it is time again? I'm not really that preachy, just remembered it. ZinMom works for me too! :D

Hang in there.

raulgonemobile said...

Ah, we all go through those phases.. I'm half in and out of one of them now.. (if only I knew which direction I was going.. )

Hang in there, and don't be afraid to say "no"

In the meantime, I'll raise a glass to you and toast.. nothing wrong with a little Zin or the beverage of your choice. :)

Michelle said...

I am sorry your feeling bumpy but this too shall pass!!!

Take care and keep on running!!!

Fatinah said...

mmm, I hope you don't give up your "me time"...dump one of those "other" commitments!! Don't pick blogging though! HAHA

nothing wrong with being a zin-mom once in a while.

Marcy said...

(((HUGS))) chica! Hopefully you can get out of some of these things. It sounds like you've got a lot on you plate. You need to ditch sumfin.

Sparky said...

I can so identify with this post. Thanks for sharing!

Charmaine said...

K. What I'm about to say is going to piss you off. But it's true.

When people allow others to make them do more then they's because they are weak.

The person who does not say no gets mad at the person who asked them to do too much. As adults, it's your job to just say, heck I have too much on my plate right now.

But we, as women, take on too much all the time, thinking we're helping despite the fact that these projects can take time away from our family and lives and crazy.